But What Does HammerheadFistpunch Have to Say About It?

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch) 01/14/2018 at 12:15 • Filed to: Hammerhead says, unnecessary capitolization

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Yes, I’m back and I’ve heard you again. What do you think of the new Ranger? You ask.

Crap on a stick you people and your complaints. I mean, not YOU people but youpeople. Imma make this crystal clear - THE OLD SMALL TRUCKS ARE GONE. The old ranger is buried and dead.

When the ranger was a thing manufactures were scrambling to find a way to meet your cries of building a more commodious, family friendly truck...then you all bought the crap outta them and still do.

They don’t make a tiny, cramped single cab long bed with 1 ton payload for the 10 people that say they’ll buy them?

I mean, yeah its a bigger truck than many were hoping for, but sit 5 guys in there or 2 kids in car seats and complain a little about its size okay?

Frankly this truck is pretty appealing on its own merits. It outengines and out transmissions every thing in its class (cept a 6 speed manual in the Tacoma).

They were wise to make a selectable rear locker optional, beats out the auto locker in the canyon and neatly matches the Tacoma and *snigger* Frontier.

I really like the Crawl...er... Trail Control option as well.

I wouldn’t buy one, but its not because I don’t think it will be a good truck...

LongbowMkII > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 12:39

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It’s cool, I’m now infatuated with the idea of a straight-6 diesel halfton anyways.

HammerheadFistpunch > LongbowMkII 01/14/2018 at 12:43

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Right?! A total GM move, make an engine you can’t use literally anywhere else but a truck, while everyone else makes an engine that goes into everything. Still cool though.

Cé hé sin > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 12:47

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Ah, but I see these things quite often (not daily, because don’t live in a big pick up market). So what do I think?

Big, ugly, awkward looking Americanised yoke.

HammerheadFistpunch > Cé hé sin 01/14/2018 at 12:48

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Most American things fit that description out of context.

For Sweden > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 12:53

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These are Good Takes

Gerry197 > Cé hé sin 01/14/2018 at 12:54

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This is just the International version of the Ranger, with the tiniest of changes, visually most people cant tell the difference between this new American Ranger than the ones sold in Europe or Asia.

Compared to other mid-sized pickups sold in Around the World by European and Asian manufacturers, this looks almost exactly the same.

So I assume your “Big, Ugly, awkward looking Americanized yoke” comment pretty much just applies to all pickups in every market.

Chuckles > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 12:58

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It’s hard to get a sense of scale in the press photos. I’d love to see some pics of the Ranger alongside the F-150 for scale.

I’m not in the market for a truck, but I think it looks pretty nice.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 12:59

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Can “What does Hammerheadfistpunch think?” Be a regular thing for new cars or industry drama? I agree with your takes and wish to subscribe to your newsletter

Ssfancyfresh > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:04

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I still don’t nderstand the man-love for the tiny old compacts of yore. Specifically the ranger. They were tiny, underpowered, awful places to be for any period of time.

On all accounts, the current crop of midsizers are better all around vehicles for working class / lifestyle pickup owners alike. I can’t see why anyone would complain.

They’re expensive. That’s a fair complaint, I guess. But they are expensive because they are packed with features and there is a market for pickups of all shapes and sizes that are packed with features.

One of my first cars was brand new 4 cylinder S10 with a manny tranny. One of the highlights if the options list were “lighted vanity mirror” in the visor.  They could t give them away. $0 down. Less than $100 a month.

Them days is gone.

MM54 > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:04

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Let’s put it in a malibu (with requisite RWD conversion) and chop the back off and make a new el camino

Nothing > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:14

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Sounds like a decent vehicle. Nice that options are coming back in the medium size (I know if I call them small, I’ll get harassed) market.

LongbowMkII > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:21

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One word. Suburban.

HammerheadFistpunch > LongbowMkII 01/14/2018 at 13:24

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Ooh I like that idea. That’s going to be a very little hot for a very large vehicle though. Still could be a winner of has prices shoot up.

HammerheadFistpunch > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 01/14/2018 at 13:27

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So far it’s a pretty regular thing, we’ll see

LongbowMkII > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:28

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also in context, but out of context too!

HammerheadFistpunch > Ssfancyfresh 01/14/2018 at 13:28

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Exactly. Those old trucks grew because of consumer demand. People wanted bigger trucks because the old ones were too small.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:42

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Does it have a 5.0 with a 6-speed?

No?

What do you mean that only 3 people would buy them?

/Crosses new Ranger off of list

So that leaves me with...

/Runs finger down list

/Rubs eyes and double checks list

... nothing...

/Pulls out jerrycan and zippo....

nafsucof > Ssfancyfresh 01/14/2018 at 13:42

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i’m 6’6” and need an extended cab to fit. so i’m with you

AestheticsInMotion > Ssfancyfresh 01/14/2018 at 13:44

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Utility. As someone who has a fleet of the “tiny, underpowered, awful Rangers” I can tell you that the current crop of midsizers are definitely NOT better All-around.

New Ranger is significantly taller, making loading/unloading more difficult. Put a ladder rack on top and many people would need to carry a step in the truck just to bring ladders down. And in an urban or Suburban area where space is tight and traffic is brutal? You want the smallest vehicle that will meet your needs, which is where the Ranger shined. Also, simplicity. While the previous Ranger’s engines certainly weren’t anything special, they were at least reliable and well suited for a work truck. I’m very leary of trusting any of Ford’s small turbo engines at the moment for various reasons, especially when the “great mileage” it will most likely showcase on the slip will be unobtainable in real-world driving. And if you had a manual transmission, the old small trucks got around just fine. Four years and 400, 000 miles on my trucks between myself and my crew, and neither I nor them have ever had any problems merging, passing, accelerating, etc.

For what it’s worth I like the new Ranger quite a bit, but it is in a completely different category than the last and fills different needs.

HammerheadFistpunch > AestheticsInMotion 01/14/2018 at 13:48

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Get a Transit connect like everyone else who needs a vehicle to do this kind of work.

AestheticsInMotion > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 13:57

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I would love a transit connect! Only problem being it would probably end up being outfitted as a ski rig/adventure vehicle... maybe stick a duel sport or some mountain bikes inside.... Is awd available?

I actually don’t see transit connect work vehicles very often around here. A lot of electricians and painters use the larger Transit vans but other than that most people seem to hold onto thier old mini trucks or go straight to a lifted diesel

HammerheadFistpunch > AestheticsInMotion 01/14/2018 at 14:06

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Seriously? TCs are everywhere here. If you don’t need a full van or truck its a Transit connect. I’ve never even heard of the idea of making the tc more “adventureready”. Literally first time I’ve even heard of the thought

Shift24 > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 15:05

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To be fair in an era of condemning diesel and a car company that was burned by diesel (though might have been their own fault), it seems GM is fit to have a Diesel for every size. Equinox, Cruze, Colorado, 1/2 ton, and HD.

Cé hé sin > Gerry197 01/14/2018 at 15:09

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Sure does! The latest breed of pickup fits that description no matter whose name appears on it.

fhrblig > Ssfancyfresh 01/14/2018 at 15:14

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I had an ‘09 Ranger with 2WD, 4-cylinder, and manual. It wasn’t underpowered, but it wasn’t fast either. It got great mileage, and it was small and fun in the snow. But it was definitely cramped. My Fiat 500 felt roomier even though it wasn’t really. I’m ok with the cab being bigger, for sure.

I’m looking forward to this Ranger and I think I’m going to start planning to get one in the next couple years.

jimz > Chuckles 01/14/2018 at 15:34

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TheTurbochargedSquirrel > AestheticsInMotion 01/14/2018 at 15:42

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“I would love one for work but I would just steal it to be my play thing”

This is a very Oppo statement.

AestheticsInMotion > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 15:49

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Huh... Maybe a location thing? I don’t know, the TC just seems like a really good mix of interior space, price (maybe, but probably capability. One of the old school 4x4 vans would be nice as well, but oh man are they costly, even without outfitting one

Chuckles > jimz 01/14/2018 at 15:58

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Thanks. Are the 2011 Global Ranger and F-150 pretty accurate of their sizes in 2018?

jimz > Chuckles 01/14/2018 at 17:43

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Pretty much, the current global ranger is just a facelift of the one in that pic, and I don’t think F-150 got any bigger from P415-P552.

Edit: and keep in mind, that graphic is showing crew cab vs. crew cab vs. Super cab. PN150 never had a crew cab (in this country,) so a super cab P375 Ranger would also look proportionally smaller.

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 17:54

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Second most popular vehicle in Australia in 2017 with 42,728 sold. Beaten only by Hilux with 47,093. Corolla was third.

Total vehicle sales for 2017 was 1,189,116. 

HammerheadFistpunch > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 01/14/2018 at 17:56

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on no, you see this one is “totally different” from yours....

/itsnotatalldifferent

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 18:30

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Well...the steering wheel in your one will be on the wrong side. And it won’t be made in a modern factory in Thailand alongside the Mazda BT-50.

So yeah agree...totally different. It just looks the same.

jimz > HammerheadFistpunch 01/14/2018 at 21:48

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can we also have a “What the yelling squirrel thinks” segment too?

bhtooefr > jimz 01/15/2018 at 19:35

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Although with similar dimensions, FWIW - the cab length came out of the bed.

Also one thing I’d like to compare is head-on shots of these vehicles, to show how the width is different from a full-size - midsizes have pretty considerable visual bulk, but they’re not that wide.

mtdrift > HammerheadFistpunch 01/16/2018 at 01:39

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The global Ranger is quite popular here in Botswana - parked next to the truly ubiquitous HiLux, they do seem quite large (especially in Wildtrak trim, which boosts the ride height and wheel/tire size). But I agree with this take and am warmed by its radiant heat.